Elements of Fitness – A Mother's Memoir

As I Turn 30

I became 30 years old last August, however, I have not come to grips with it yet.  Yes, I’ve accomplished a lot.  I went to college (or shall I say ‘visited’), I have met some wonderful, very special people and I have 3 beautiful children along with a wonderful life in suburbia but still . . . I have had a hard time accepting that my twenties are over. 

I guess because I got pregnant at such a young age I was forced to grow up sooner than I thought I would have to.  I always thought I was missing out.  Having 2 babies by the time I was 23 a lot of my friends were single with no children.  

But now I’m realizing I have an advantage:   my kids will be out of the house by the time I’m 40!  (Well, at least my oldest will!) 

I never imagined in my twenties that when I would reach 30 I would look back with such disappointment in myself. 

Not until social networking sites such as Facebook and classmates.com did I realize that most everyone I grew up with has started their own families and they also live in suburbia.  The only difference between us is they hung out and drank more alcohol than I did!  See full size image




In recent weeks, I have reconnected with old crushes, class clowns, and friends I had that I thought back then would never disappear out of my life.  

I just spoke with an old friend from high school that disappeared 6 months before we graduated.  No one knew where he went or why he never said goodbye.  Fourteen years later I get an email that he is requesting confirmation that we’re “friends” on Facebook.  I immediately accepted and he explained that his parents had a falling out and then he chose to enlist in the army when he turned 18 (6 months before our graduation).

He met someone a month later and they had a son within that very same year.  I mention him because he and I were very close all through high school.  Then our junior year he dated a very close friend of mine.  When they broke up, he asked me out.  I won’t deny that I considered it.  I knew him long before they were together and I was the one who introduced them.  And even though at times he and I got along better than they did, I reluctantly declined out of respect for my friend. 

However, I haven’t spoken to her for 13 years!  So had I foreseen that, I probably would’ve said yes to him and then I would be a military wife right now with 4 kids living in Orange County. 

   The little choices we make in life end up paving our destiny.   And you don’t even realize it when it’s happening.   So I will begin to embrace my 30’s and look at my twenties as the learning curve.  In the words of Matthew McConaughey, “years are just something from a calendar”.


April 2, 2009 - Posted by | About Me, Being a Mom, Children, Me | , , , , , , , ,

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